The challenges of step parenting are legendary. You only have to read fairytales to come across the legend that is the evil stepmother. Cinderella and Snow White, to name a few of many, both had wicked stepmothers. The stepfather is not left unscathed. His fate is much worse, he is deemed irrelevant. There are no well known fairy tales in which he is even mentioned.
The dominance or absence of these two figures in fairytales gives us important information, it tells us that step parents are likely to have a hard time, feeling either fundamentally bad or entirely absent in relation to their step child.
There is great confusion around how we can skilfully embody the step parenting role. It is as if, like our fairytales, we feel hopeless that this role can be anything but difficult.
Therapy can help you work towards becoming more skilful and self-aware when dealing with step parenting challenges. It can also help you find an identity outside of this role.
Do you ever experience the following:
- Feel resentful, frustrated & overwhelmed?
- Are lost about how to manage & respond to difficulties?
- Feel like you have to compete with your stepchild for your partner’s attention?
- Struggle with difficult feelings towards your stepchildren?
- Find it difficult to bond with your stepchildren?
- Feel like you’re on your own, and not backed up by your stepchild’s parent?
- Are considering giving it all up?
If you have ever experienced any of these feelings, know that therapy is a place where you can be heard, supported, and given permission to explore all of your feelings.
I work with step parents so they can:
- Redefine their role in the family and consequently find more peace and clarity.
- Learn to meet their own needs and assert what they need.
- Explore and work through their relationship with their step children.
- Unravel deeper issues that are being triggered by step parenting.
- Explore their family of origin issues and how they may be impacting their current family system.
- Discover how to use step parenting as a spiritual practice.
Check out First Steps/Fees to take this journey further and book an appointment either in London Bridge, Sevenoaks or online.